My Human Design Experiment

Human Design found me in 2017/18 and I glanced at it briefly but didn’t really have the time to jump in. I’ve always been fascinated with any typing system for self-knowledge and a sucker for a quiz. I’d already explored Myers Briggs testing, Gallup Strengths, Enneagram as well as having a lifelong interest in astrology.

At this time in my life, I had a lot going on, so it was really a case of ‘ooohh that sounds great’ then shelving it while I worked multiple jobs to get a house renovated and sold. In 2019 I began to look a little closer and then 2020 when the world lost its mind and changed direction forever, I finally took my chance to go deeper.

As with anything, the timing is always perfect in retrospect even when it seems chaotic in the moment. 2020 was a HUGE year for me. I had moved countries, was living in a new town where I hardly knew anyone, and I felt like I was watching a train wreck in slow motion as far as the world was concerned but with all that time being locked in our homes I had space to go deep on the things I was interested in.

The system of Human Design predicted this time we are presently in. It is called the Solar Plexus Mutation and describes a period of seven years 2020 – 2027 when the humanity would undergo a massive transformation as we move out of the old energetic patterns on the Earth and into a whole new way of Being. I had the heads-up, and I couldn’t believe the timing, it was bang on.

While the world unraveled

When everything started ramping up, I stayed quiet and studied. I went deep into the field of Human Design and worked through two levels of certification in a year and began my own personal experiment using the knowledge of this fascinating system.

I learned about my type, the Manifesting-Generator and how my sacral provides a sustainable source of energy and life force. I learned that I’m an emotionally defined Being with an individual emotional wave and that giving time to my decisions is the correct way to ensure I make good ones.

Both these things were game changing for me. I’d always felt immense pressure when someone put me on the spot to decide. I would find myself feeling frazzled and unsure what to do but not wanting to let others down so often I made a snap decision from my thoughts and then later regretted it.

Alternatively, I’d try to outsource my decisions to others because I was so confused, and I’d end up with as many different opinions as people I’d asked for guidance. Learning to wait it out and gain clarity over time made so much sense to my system it was like being given a permission slip to exhale. After a while of practicing, I was able to develop a deeper trust in my own inner authority, one that I will never again doubt.

Deconditioning, a necessary part

I’ve found personally that almost everything I learned, required some level of deconditioning work to absorb the information and be able to utilize it in a practical way. Learning I do have sustainable energy, but I have to use it in a certain way required that I let go of a belief I’d held about the scarcity of energy and that I didn’t have enough of it.

Having suffered chronic fatigue type states a couple of times in my life I’d taken on this idea that my sensitivity must mean I simply don’t have the energy I need to function well. I no longer believe this at all, but it took some time to figure out how I’d got myself into those states and that knowing how my energy is designed to flow optimally would keep me from experiencing that again.

Learning the way a Mani-gen bounces around between different passions, spins multiple plates and often skips steps but then must go back over the foundations was also a breath of fresh air that explained so much about my character and the way I approach life.

And yet again, I was met with the work of deconditioning beliefs and projections from others that I’d allowed into my psyche. ‘You never finish anything’, ‘you’ll never be established if you keep moving around like that’ were comments I’d taken on and interpreted to mean I was doing it all wrong.

Again, I had to learn to reframe, and this wasn’t done with a click of the fingers after consuming the knowledge. It took some sitting with all the emotions that came up as a result before I could throw them off for good.

The work of deconditioning is said to take around seven years from first learning about Human Design but in my opinion, it is the work of a lifetime. We are constantly being conditioned in our open centres so it stands to reasons that the work of reaffirming who we are never ends.

I will also add that deconditioning work is not simply an intellectual process but deep work that involves feeling your feelings, being curious and bravely exploring old memories when they rise to the surface and doing somatic healing work when necessary too.

The gifts and the gold

By far the best bit has been learning about the different expressions of my design and knowing how to spot when I’m in a lower or imbalanced expression, accepting the lesson or challenge of that energy and being able to move into a higher expression of the gift.

I love that nothing in Human Design is good or bad. It’s simple a spectrum of expression that we all move through and not just once, but over and over when we are gifted certain themes to work with in our own unique blueprint.

I grew up in a household where I didn’t feel fully seen for my gifts and strengths and often felt mis-understood. It resulted in a lonely childhood and when no one is there to reflect these gifts back to you, it’s very hard to recognize them in yourself. The process of learning what I am personally blessed to work with and develop has been heartening and being able to share this with others brings me joy.

The work of unfurling who I am is an ongoing beautiful and mysterious spiral. My experiment will continue throughout this lifetime as I feel like I will never truly know it all. The breadth and depth of this mystery of what it is to be a human, a soul living through a body on Earth is truly infinite and magical. Bring it on, I say!