The Universe rewards the brave

I recently interviewed Sonja Courtis on my ‘Inner Awakening’ podcast and at the end I ask her about this powerful quote that I spied on her website. She delivers a stellar answer, but listen to the whole chat as she’s such a bright bubble of energy and enthusiasm for health, wellness and healing. 

She shares her own story about losing her only brother in childhood and how that shaped who she is today. And she shares how she found (or manifested) her man Marcel in her late forties and why you should never give up on finding the love you want.

Being brave is part of the hero’s journey

Being brave, taking the fork in the road that says ‘Unknown destination’ is always the scarier option to our brains that like the safe, the known and the predictable.

The other fork leads to a gravelly old road full of deep ruts because we’ve travelled that one a thousand times and know every inch of it. We know how to avoid the potholes and what lies ahead making it feel safer to our nervous systems. We tend to do this even if we know that this road is ruining our car and the other road could have smooth bitumen around the next corner. But there’s risk.

The hero’s journey does not start out with ‘Tommy took the familiar road to the nearest supermarket to buy his same, same weekly groceries’. We would close our books immediately if that were the case.

Instead try – ‘Tommy decided instead of his usual route to work where he was propped up on caffeine to get through a day of data entry with a scowling boss looking over his shoulder, he would do something different. He packed a small pack of essentials and headed to the train station, bought a ticket to a destination he’d never heard of and sat down with sweaty palms and a beating heart watching the other office workers staring mechanically at their phones’.

You’re far more likely to read on right? 

The non-brave choice is boring, predictable, safe to our brains and the outcome is generally known. But the first major hurdle that the brave choice and the hero’s journey has to overcome is FEAR.

Our soul’s yearn for us to step up with courage

As to why the Universe rewards taking this route? I don’t know for sure, I don’t have certainty, but I can make an educated as well as intuitive guess that it’s to do with energetic alignment and your soul’s wishes.

When something from deep within you whispers about a desire to take a new path it’s usually correct. This is your Soul speaking. In contrast, your inner critic is brash, loud and condescending. It likes to tell you what NOT to do and all the petty reasons why not. ‘You’ll look like a bad person’, ‘people will think you are lazy’, ‘you’ve never succeed’, ‘you’ll only end up feeling sorry for yourself and regretting it’.

These favourite lines shouted by the Inner critic sound like the worst, most harsh and judgemental parts of us, or sometimes they even sound like a parent, early caregiver or teacher if you have internalised their voice.

Similar fearful words and stories can be projected upon us by others. When we are dipping a toe into an idea that is brave and scary we can be sure that those closest to us will also deliver comments that sound like those above, some may be as harsh as our own inner voice, some are much more watered down.

It’s worth spending your time to dissect them. How much of that statement is actually a reflection of my own inner fear, and how much is it their fear, judgment or opinion? Because it can be both. Sometimes our nearest and dearest can tap into our unspoken fears and voice them for us. What sounds like a negative comment can be a gift from those who see our blind spots. It can help us to flesh out the idea further before we take the leap. Maybe there’s things we haven’t adequately considered.

Other times it is simply the other’s own fear because they are not used to being brave. Or it’s just their own viewpoint because they have different values and a different design to you. Remember you are a completely unique Being. Your brave hero’s journey will never be the same as anyone else’s.

You will know your inner critic from your Soul’s whispers because one sounds like the naysayer and the other sounds like self-love and a call to adventure.

How to be brave

What is it that scares you? Write it down and then write down why you think it scares you? Flesh it all out and determine whether that fear is something you want to move towards in a constructive brave way or continue to avoid (no right or wrong here, some fears are quite legitimate.)

What’s the thing you’ve been avoiding? Often it’s something we know we need to face sooner or later but keep finding excuses to make it later. As we try to suppress the urge and not have to face this, it only grows louder and ends up taking up more of our mental space, the opposite of what we desire. is it time to face up to this task, action or conversation?

What is the one next step you know you need to take in order to move towards a big goal or dream? I see this in the online entrepreneur world when business owners faff around endlessly with websites, Instagram grids or setting up all their background stuff but delay putting themselves and their message into the world. Hiding behind pretty branding won’t get you clients, trust me I’ve tried it. 

What do you need to let go of in order to make space for the new? I received an instant visual as I wrote those words. Apparently, as a toddler I would stand under the washing line where my blankie ended up when Mum decided it was too grotty and I’d cling to the corner (assuming I could reach it) until it was dry and given back to me. My security blanket, literally. Fine for a toddler. Not ideal for an grown ass woman. 

We all have versions of blankie, a relationship that we’ve outgrown, a job that we barely tolerate, a voluntary role that is no longer filling our cup, a committee we are on that is heading in a direction opposed to our values. Etc. Do some journaling on what you are clinging too that feels familiar yet stands in the way of heeding the call.

Further resources for being brave

An earlier podcast episode I did with Sarah Larsen is all about FEAR, how to understand the brain and bio hack it to work through your fear and achieve great things. Sarah would know, she resolved her own crippling anxiety and signed up for a triathlon having never attempted anything like it before. She crushed it! She also talks about her ongoing relationship with fear to a rapidly growing audience. I have no doubt that Sarah is going to be a powerful leader in this area and she had to face immense fear and anxiety to make brave choices and step into this role. Have a listen to her story HERE. 

I always like listening to Brene Brown on this topic. In this snippet with Tim Ferris she talks about the armour that we put on in early life or as a trauma response. She also mentions the fork in the road that I am talking about here. Her description of what happens when we decide to go against the Soul’s calling and take the familiar road is hilariously brutal – “these are the people that have to double down on their shit and walk, cheeks squeezed through the world”. More importantly, she also talks about the pain that you can cause to others via that choice. A refusal to honour your own Soul calling is guaranteed to be taken out on others in some way or another too. Our choice to be brave affects everyone around us. Watch HERE.